The Art of First Date Conversations: 8 Questions to Hone Your Skills
Let’s say you’re on a first date after meeting on an online dating app. You seem to have a lot in common already, but as they say ‘the proof is in the pudding’.
Sitting across from each other you’ve asked some of the standard questions: where are they from, what do they do for a living, did they go to college and what was their major? Some or all of these questions may have already been asked on a dating app like Zepeel.
Zepeel is an avant-garde online dating app with a video-based platform. By using all of its features from a video profile, to text messaging, video messaging, and a first-of-its-kind live video chat, what do you do for conversation now?
Taking all these factors into consideration we present below some key questions to get the ball rolling.
1. What Are Your Dreams and Goals?
One of the hallmarks of compatibility is you share similar views of the world or have the same outlook on life (is the glass half-full or half-empty?) Do they want to start their own business, learn a language, run the Boston Marathon? You get the idea. If their dreams and aspirations harmonize with some of your own, you know you’re on the right track to forming a real relationship.
2. What is the Most Unusual Job You’ve Ever Held?
This question is a story-starter. People love stories, love to tell them and love to hear them. Your date could turn out to be a master raconteur, relishing the telling of a chapter from their past. This is also an opportunity to talk about your own experience.
3. What Are the Things You Find Funny?
Singles, especially women, place a high value on a sense of humor. No one wants to be around someone humorless, who can suck the life out of a room. You want someone who is fun to be around, live with, and grow old with.
Also Read >> First Date Jitters: What You Can Do About Them
4. Who Are the People That Matter Most in Your Life?
A capacity for intimacy and connectedness show the person you are learning about is able to bond strongly with others. Do they come from a close-knit family, have long-standing friendships and friends they can depend on to be there for them?
5. What Do You Like to Do on Weekends?
Answering this question will help you discover their lifestyle and what activities you might share. Do they like to read the Sunday paper end-to-end? Do they play tennis, watch sports, hike, or attend a book club? If they’re bringing work home, you’ve got a hard-charging career person on your hands. Not exactly an ideal way to unwind and re-group for the week ahead.
6. Are You a Planner or Spontaneous?
Do they like to do things on the spur-of-the-moment? A freewheeling approach like this can add zip to a relationship. Or do planned events in their mind build a pleasurable sense of anticipation? Knowing that opposites attract, a methodical planner could find their spontaneous partner’s ability to shake things up now and again adds some excitement to the relationship.
Also Read >> How to Have an Amazing Zepeel First Date!
7. What Was Your Childhood Like?
With this question you want to measure your date’s emotional stability. Was their family unit more or less harmonious? (Some dysfunction exists in every family though, so it’s not necessarily a deal breaker). If they had a troubled upbringing, find out if they sought help to work out their issues. Or does their response indicate they haven’t healed. This is a biggie. Although you want to support a partner emotionally, you also don’t want to babysit them.
8. Who is the Most Interesting Person You Know?
Do they have a friend or colleague who’s wildly eccentric? Or someone with a captivating intellect? What are the dynamics of this relationship? An answer to this question will reveal the qualities they appreciate in others and may identify with.
Some Conversation Etiquette
Being a good listener is essential in establishing a relationship. However, healthy relating requires a good give-and-take between participants. You don’t want a lop-sided conversation where one person monopolizes the conversation and has no curiosity about their date. It’s a turn-off. A narcissist is someone you don’t want to be in a relationship with because it’s all about them.
Enjoy the Journey
Learning about someone is not an overnight event. Asking questions about personal matters can discomfit people. Relax and take things slower. It could be months before you or your dating partner feel they want to start disclosing personal knowledge about themselves. In the meantime, by being patient you are building trust in each other, the bedrock of solid friendships.
Your support system of family and friends are who you should air your frustrations with, not in a nascent relationship. Keep the conversations positive, show your best self, and allow the relationship to develop of its own accord. Trying to push the relationship into deeper waters before its time will only scare someone off.
Author Bio: Patricia attended San Francisco State University and earned a degree in Technical and Professional Writing in 2008. She took a professional development course, B2B High-Performance Copy-writing from American Writers and Artists Inc., in which she learned among other things lead generation, white papers, and landing pages. she has experience in blogging and expert in writing different topics.